Ann's Last Nerve
The winds up here…
So, this week's winds have been taking their toll, and the snow reminds us that we are still in winter up here, regardless of what the calendar says.
The winds got serious enough to up-root strong Ponderosa pines and displace the new neighbor's patio furniture.
When the winds decide to start whipping around, there is little you can do except bitch about it over a glass of wine.
When the winds get serious, they can last from a couple of days to a few weeks or longer and can wreak havoc not only on the neighborhood but also on your nerves as well.
It can end your electricity and make the simplest of chores outside a pain in the ass.
Most of the time, you need to prepare with common sense.
Those plastic lawn chairs take a beating up here and eventually end up somewhere down the mountain, so find something heavy and sturdy that can stand the pain, and find a place to store that big umbrella until we get a calm summer breeze.
Chimes, flags, and bird feeders…need I say more? I do. Simply take them down and put them back up after the storm passes.
When you get wind gusts around 70mph, and you see bits and pieces of the forest flying by your head, then you'll understand my bitch and wine theory.
But for now…
Oh Darn
Well, all this wind finally grabbed onto Ann's last nerve and twisted that old son of a bitch because the o'l girl was acting out of sorts this morning.
I was still trying to feel my way around the coffee pot, praying there was still a donut left, when I heard an "Oh damn! Darn it all!"
Well, which one is it?
Is it an Oh damn or an Oh darn kind of morning we're going to have around here?
If it's going to be an Oh damn kind of morning, I can just slip my ass back into bed after I find that donut. Not like I've got a lot going on today anyway.
But there she was, just standing motionless, staring through the dining room window as if to let the words float around the room for a while. Oh damn! Darn it all!" Haunting me.
The cabin was warm and toasty, yet I was feeling a cold shiver.
What the hell is this all about?
It takes a mountain load of grief to get the o’l girl to cuss so I was a bit miffed by her getting rattled so early in the morning.
I can burn dinner, forget her middle name, or leave the little yapping dog at the vet by mistake and the worse I would get is a "Darn it, Jay."
But for her to change her normal "darn" into an undeniable "damn" gave me a reason for pause. Did I miss the toilet again? Forget our anniversary? Drink her wine…again, and she’s just thinking out loud while looking out through the windows?
The o’l girl wasn’t done with me yet because she followed up with a "Would you just look at that," as she paused her sip of coffee.
Now, she has me sweating bullets. Look at what? What the hell did I do after that last glass of wine that could possibly be triggering the Ire of Ann’s wrath, and why did I leave it, apparently in plain view?
I was leaning in her direction when she suddenly turned and walked away, mumbling something about a scarf.
So, I had to ask, "What in the hell was that oh damn all about."
"Oh, it's this wind again,” was her five-word explanation for my near panic attack.
Just the wind again? That's it? I'm chewing valiums here, and this is just about the wind?
I guess she was showing her disapproval of the local wind Gods that have been harassing us all for the past few days, and I can’t blame her.
So, when the dust settled, and I could think clearly again, it turned out to just be an "Oh darn it" kind of morning. But damn…
Thanks for listening.
Photo of the Week:
We didn't get a chance to catch any new wildlife photos this week because of the fierce winds, but you might thank me anyway because the photo of the week is a beauty.
January 1st of 2021. A weary herd of bucks bedded down for the first day of the new year as if to say “Whew. That was a hell of a year.”
I love the angle of this shot, highlighting the cluster of antlers.
Well, I want to thank you for dropping by, and I look forward to talking with you again same time next week.
Just Jay Talking is released each Thursday before high noon, Mountain time.